With troubled heart, my friend Jocelyn Winfrey left this world a few days ago. I met Jocelyn over a decade ago, she was tall, loud, and quite pugnacious and quarrelsome in her body language and tone. Some folks found this distasteful both at work and in the community. She was talked about at work because of her behavior and tone, yet I saw another side of her and appreciated her for who she was – no holds barred, she said what she meant and she meant what she said. She was not the kind of person to allow anyone to walk around with a veil covering their face – hiding from the truth, as a matter of fact, she would snatch it off and then render love in her own special way.
John 10:10 New International Version (NIV)
10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
Jesus said that anyone who enters other than the “front” door is the same as a thief, but if you enter through the door of the shepherd He will hear you by your name. The ugly twist to this is that if you don’t enter through His door you may find yourself alone traveling aimlessly through this world without protection. There is a wolf roaming about whose has but one purpose to kill, either by destroying or stealing. There are those who say drug addiction is a disease and some who say it is a spiritual attack or evil spirit. They might conclude that for those who are currently struggling with addictions, this death as egregious as it appeared to be, the attack gives one a tangible picture of how the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. We can talk about that topic another time, for today my focus is on my friend Jocelyn. She battled with drug addiction in the last few years after having experienced freedom from drugs for a great many years. While she struggled, many left her side, many loved her from a distance – I surmise in her best days she was a handful! One thing I know for sure for those she loved she went out of her way to show her love. I remember she gave a party for a friend – just because, we laughed and enjoyed pizza in New Haven at Abate and talked about some great times and wonderful memories. However, if you turned your head for a second you would experience her wrath.
One fond memory I would like to share is the unconditional love she had. We were outside on a break from work one day and we were talking about the maintenance on my car. I was explaining to Jocelyn that since my “then” husband was away doing experiments with other women and such, I found myself with a new car and no man to do the stuff men do with their new vehicles. I remember telling her that since I knew how to read, I read the manual or directions and I intended to do absolutely every single solitary suggestion listed in the book under “maintenance”. I changed the oil as suggested, checked the tires, bought new ones as suggested, changed wipers and most of all I washed it once a week (ok that wasn’t in the manual – that was my own suggestion), even when there was snow on the ground. When the car reached its 60,000-mile mark, the manual suggested that I change the timing belt, I checked out a few mechanics and to my surprise, the cost was around $2,500. Jocelyn said to me, “…do you need $2,500”? I was still ranting and raving about that man being absent from his “vehicle duties” – again she asked me, “…do you need $2,500”? I said, well of course but I’ll get it in time. Jocelyn said to me when do you want to get the belt changed, I replied, “When I get the money together”. To which she replied, “…do you need $2,500”? Ohhhhhhh, the light bulb went off, she was offering me $2,500!
To my friend Jocelyn, Good Night – for the war in this world is over for you…
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